Raising Children Archives

A Message for You Concerning Your Treasure

Don’t underestimate what you as a mother does every day for your child. When our culture’s message makes us feel that we are not living up to our true potential, don’t believe it.   We take for granted what we offer our children – love, security, and the caring not only for their physical needs but their emotional needs. These are not things they can live without. It is vital to their lives.   I just finished reading a gripping book by Laura Schroff called The Invisible Thread where she tells of the friendship she developed with an 11-year old black boy who was a panhandler on the streets begging for money so he could eat. Ms. Schroff made a difference in Maurice’s life, not because…

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Eliminating the Boredom Issue in Children

Have you ever heard the words, “I’m bored,” or “There’s nothing to do.” from a child or teenager? Why is that? Being bored is a good indicator that a child has been entertained too much and most usually from the following: videos, television, video games or activities away from home. When you’re constantly being entertained in the passive way that videos, t.v. and video games do, your creative side suffers. You are unable or hampered in thinking of activities that appeal beyond more of the same. We like being entertained and don’t want the work of doing it ourselves. Activities away from home can also be detrimental to our children’s creative thinking if they aren’t the right kinds of activities and besides kids need downtime….

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I wrote the following thoughts for the girls in our Castle Keeper club. I trust it is a blessing to you. Chances are you are starting to think of your future and start to wonder who God has for you. Who you will wed, what he looks like and how it’s going to come about and…on and on. It’s how God designed us. Maybe you think that year is far off but is it? Whether that day is 1 or 2 or even 5 years away there are some things are some things you can be doing right now while you are waiting. 1. Pray for your future mate. If it’s the Lord will for you to get married, you have a wonderful privilege to…

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How does one go about the forming of a habit both in ourselves and our children? Start with focusing on only one thing that you desire to change. In a famous article published in 1983, Anya Bateman tells how she changed her life by focusing on only one thing she wanted to change and then doing it for 21 days.  For some of the habits she was trying to form, she kept a journal of her thoughts and excuses and anything else that came up that made her not want to keep her agreement with herself. While working on forming a habit, we must be ever careful not to let ourselves or our children fail in the keeping of them.  We must be vigilant. I know this firsthand. …

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Yesterday, I was cutting up a cantaloupe and Audrey says to me, “Does that come from an animal?” Thinking all along that she was just having fun, I responded, “No, it comes from the ground.” “What is it?” “It’s a melon.” As we continued to talk, it finally came out that she assumed I was cutting up a cantaloupe which she concluded was part of an antelope. Because I had never thought to explain where cantaloupe’s come from. Oh dear, there are gaps in our homeschooling!  The greatest fear of a homeschooling mom.  I was so very close to having one. Whew! Barely saved. My Audrey knows more about how goats, chickens, and puppies are born than how a cantaloupe grows. I know most parents would not panic over this conversation.  Like you…

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Congratulations to the sweetest of daughters, my Serenity. I feel a little bit amazed today. Our sweet daughter Serenity has graduated from the 8th grade and will now be embarking on her high school education. This weekend at our homeschool convention, Serenity went through the commencement program that they plan for 7th-9th graders.  And you know what?  She loved it!! She enjoyed it so much that she wishes she could do it again. Now that’s a big surprise coming from her because she’s quiet and doesn’t like attention focused on herself.   After seeing Serenity’s reaction to her graduation, I was reminded me of a story Florence Littauer tells about her mother. Florence’s mother was a Phlegmatic, according to Florence’s division of personality types. In case you don’t know what phlegmatic…

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Do Your Children Know You Like Them?

I was talking to a friend recently who shared with me that her 7 year old son complains that she never plays with him.  She said, “I spend a lot of time with him.  I sit in the bathroom while he bathes, I sit with him while he does homework, I read to him, he reads to me.”  That sounds commedable doesn’t it?  I would be happy if I did I those things.  We all have limited time with the myriad obligations of homeschooling and homemaking responsibilities and the thought of carving out more time seems impossible.  But you know what a person with wisdom said to her when she mentioned it to them? “Those are all motherly things.  You need to do things with him.”  Wow.  That hit me between the…

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Where Do I Go For Wisdom?

Six children with different bents, quirks, ideas and personalities. Each one unique from the other. How is it possible when they share the same mom and dad? They say no two people, of the 6.76 billion, world population have the same palm print or fingerprint. This is incredible. There are over 10,000 bird species, an estimated 100,000 different trees… and more then 1,000,000 different insect species. Our God showing He is a God of variety. I cannot fathom the greatness of Him. With six children, alike in some ways, but different in so many other areas how can I know how to lead and train them? Raising children is no cakewalk for me. I need help and direction. Some days I make one mistake and…

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Teaching Children to Work

This week my husband and I watched a video by Michael Pearl called Teaching Responsibility. I am really impressed with his wisdom. I like his practical down-to-earth manner on dealing with children. I know a lot of parents don’t agree with him but I’m not one of them – I really think he has a lot of insight into child rearing. In the video he says children should work with you before they know what work really is. If you wait until they’re old enough to really help you, you are sitting yourself up for grumbling and complaining. Children want to feel needed and enjoy working alongside you. For example, when you’re washing dishes, have them sit on the counter beside the sink with a…

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Becoming A Man

Recently, I was asked at what age did my children start hunting.  This mother said her son was interested in getting a BB gun but that she was feeling unsure about it.  This post is in reply to that question, in addition to a few more of my thoughts on boys becoming men.  I in no way feel like I have all the answers but since my husband and I have 4 boys these are things we think about.  We live in a society where women try to dominate and men are becoming more effeminate.  Have you heard of the term the metrosexual man?  This is a man who "wears designer clothes, investing in pricey lotions and potions to keep his skin buttery soft.  He likes the…

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Children Spell Love T-I-M-E

Do my children realize how important they are to me?  It’s not enough that I know that they are one of my highest priorities, I must convey that to them. I say they are my highest priorities but what do my action speak?  I catch myself giving them minimal attention when they come to tell me something I may consider trivial or worse, being impatient.  I notice that I seem too busy to spend time doing things with them that they enjoy.  My life becomes one of function, just trying to stay on track with all the tasks that need to be completed and when I do diverge it’s to focus on interests of mine. If every time they approach mom she seems uninterested they’ll start withdrawing to keep from being…

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Recognizing If or Where My Child Needs Training

This really struck a chord with me today. In his book Hints on Child Training, H. Clay Trumbull (who I believe is the great-great grandfather of Elisabeth Elliott) wrote: “Child training is, in many a case, the bringing of a child into purely conventional ways, instead of bringing out into freest play, in the child, those qualities and characteristics which mark him as a unique and individual personality among the sons of men. How to learn wherein it needs curbing or changing, is a question of questions in child training.” This is really making me think. So often I think I train my children with an eye for making them look good instead of allowing them to be just ‘them‘. If I don’t like a certain…

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